Weekly I meet with dog owners full of angst. As a dog behavior consultant, disillusioned dog owners come to me with regularity, their dreams of a raising a perfect puppy or giving a better life to a rescue dog going awry. Usually it’s something simple (pulling on the leash, jumping on visitors, digging in the yard, barking, housetraining issues, etc.) Those things are easily fixed through training and I relish the opportunity to do so.

Sometimes, however, the problems are more serious: the adolescent puppy starts growling at children, or the rescue dog bites a friend who comes to visit. In one of my recent cases, the dog started hiding under the sofa and submissively urinating whenever the family came home.

My job as a trainer and behavior consultant is to help make things right – for the dog. In cases where simple training and boundaries will help control unwanted behaviors and make a dog feel more secure, I guide the owners through that process. But in cases that involve fear or aggression, I’m not dealing with a training issue; I’m dealing with an unhappy dog.

As I am fond of saying, “A happy dog doesn’t growl or bite.” The most important part of an aggression consultation is figuring out why the dog is unhappy and whether or not the family is able to minimize the stress in his environment. Is the dog perturbed about strangers coming onto his property, yet he lives in a busy household with visitors coming and going constantly? Does he dislike the company of other dogs, yet was brought into a household with existing canine family members? Is he frightened of children, but lives in a house with four of them under the age of twelve? When the dog’s stress IS his environment, it’s time to think about the well-being of the dog and the nature of the owner’s commitment to him.

Many clients often say, “I’m committed to making this work.” “I’m not going to give up.” “I made a commitment and I’m not a quitter.” I remind them, this is not about them or how good a person they are. This is about what’s best for their dog. Clinging stubbornly to a “commitment’ that makes us feel good, but continues to make our dog miserable is no virtue. If we care about our dog, perhaps the greatest gift we can give him is a new home, better suited to his personality and his needs. A dog that bites should not be in a home with children or a home with a traffic pattern like Grand Central Station. He would be happier in a quiet, predictable environment with proper containment and an owner familiar with managing this behavior. A dog that’s afraid of his family should be allowed to live with a different one. This is a difficult and delicate conversation for a consultant to initiate and for a dog owner to hear, but in some cases it is a conversation that needs to happen.

We should all be committed to our dogs and to giving them the best and the most that we possibly can. But sometimes….a new home is the best home. For the dog.

-Diva

The plethora of doggie daycare centers around the country in the last few years is nothing short of mind-boggling.  But with the popularity of daycare services for dogs, there comes an unrealistic expectation –that all dogs can and should be social with others – they’re “social animals”, after all.  The truth, however, is not nearly as simple or clear-cut, and many dog owners are finding themselves disillusioned and confused when their dogs fail to make the grade in daycare.

Many dog parents believe that if their dog is not good around other dogs, this can be overcome by more social exposure, so they sign up for doggie daycare.  Or when they get a new puppy, a super-responsible owner will get their pup enrolled in a puppy play and doggie daycare program, believing that this early and ongoing socialization will “guarantee” their puppy’s future social skills. Oh, that it were so simple!  Here is Nature’s perspective on the tricky subject of dogs and social interactions.  If your canine child has had trouble integrating into a dog park or daycare situation, read on.

Dogs are wired by Mother Nature to live in packs.  But what is a pack, exactly?  It’s an extended family of dogs, all related and familiar to one another – parents, grandparents, brothers, sisters, aunts, uncles and cousins.  Day in and day out, the same dogs are in this big family. Puppies are born each season into the family pack.  Puppies grow and develop through infancy, adolescence and finally into their serious adult character, whatever Nature has genetically coded for them. Once an adult, a dog’s duty is to help defend the pack.  Woe to the new dog that wanders into a family territory, the adult pack members rising up and driving off the intruder. They do not welcome him in and offer him a seat at the dinner table.

But newcomers are the norm in doggie daycare and dog parks.  Every few minutes, a new dog is arriving.  The daycare or dog park “pack” is made up of different dogs everyday, with little to no familiarity with each other.  They quickly sort out their organizational structure and then must decide to accept or reject each newcomer.   Each newcomer, turn,  is faced with the uncertainty of whether or not they will be accepted by the group.  When the group is made up of young, carefree pre-adults, there’s usually little problem.  Kids like everybody! With an older demographic, however, harmony between the dogs can become more elusive.  After all, it was the job of their ancestors to drive off newcomers, not accept them!

The most difficult situation I encounter, as a daycare operator is when a wonderful client brings their young dog to daycare and all starts out well, but over time the dog becomes less and less social until they are no longer appropriate in a social daycare setting.  Failing to understand this behavioral change as a result of maturation, the client, understandably, tends to think their dog is being singled out unfairly or unjustly. They are upset and confused.  Everything had been fine before.  In reality, however, things have changed as the result of the inevitable passage of time and the genetic code that predestined their dog’s adult personality from the get-go.

Does this mean that adult dogs cannot be successful in daycare?  Not at all!  Many breeds have been so domesticated and dialed-down as to smooth out the sharp edges of their original adult canine ancestors, making them, in essence, perpetual puppies.  Labs, Goldens and similar breeds come to mind.  No wonder they do so well in daycare!  Other breeds, however, were bred to remain sharp and discerning, as there was need for this character in the job for which they were developed.  German Shepherds and other serious working dogs are good examples of this.  These breeds can find today’s daycare settings very challenging, especially as they mature.  Many of these dogs would rather have their own room than run with the Great Unwashed (!)

So if your canine child is a daycare drop-out, do not fret.  It just means he’s very smart and very grown-up.  He gets an “A” in Canine.  Your children will be what they will be, after all.  So you may not have the doctor you were hoping for…success and happiness come in all forms.  Love your dog for the dog he is, and give him the life that makes him happiest.  For some dogs, that’s peace and quiet – not daycare.

Diva

Many years ago, when I first began my career  as a dog trainer, I was out training one of my students at our country feed store.  While I was putting the dog through his Sit/Down/Heel paces, a young homeless man passed me with his puppy on a rope and muttered, “Sit is stupid.”  At the time, I was a bit offended and passed off his comment as one of utter ignorance.  Years later, I realized the homeless vagabond was right.    Sit is stupid!

Let me explain.  While specific commands (like Sit, Down, Heel) are handy and convenient, they have nothing to do with who’s in charge and they are unnatural in the dog world.  They are trained “performances” from your dog in response to those words.  Don’t get me wrong – I like having my dog sit to be collared, and heel smartly when working our way through a crowd.  But none of those trained behaviors get to the core of the human/dog relationship, develop a sense of responsibility in my dog or make her see me as her boss.  It’s just a performance for the moment.

What dogs are looking for is the leader that will set the limits of their behavior by telling them what is NOT allowed.  An Alpha dog in a pack never uses Sit or other commands to do this!  What he does is set boundaries for the other dogs – telling them in clear, canine terms what is NOT acceptable.  I bring this up within the context of this discussion on Sit, because too many dog owners use “Sit” instead of “Stop That.”

Think about it.  When your dog is misbehaving on the leash, do you tell him to Sit in order to calm him down?  When guests arrive and your dog is jumping wildly all over them, do you shout your Sit command to bring the chaos under control?  When your dog is pulling on the leash, do you tell him to Heel to solve the problem?  While these commands may provide temporary relief, they do not teach your to think about his behavior or learn to avoid it in the future.  They simply put your dog on a command-performance where considering alternatives is not even allowed.  Since your dog has not learned that jumping and bad leash manners are not allowed, he will repeat them next time – until your redirect him with a your Sit command.

In nature, dogs don’t respond to commands; they learn to use their brains.  It is “management by exception” in the dog pack, with the Alpha dog stepping in when necessary to tell the others what is NOT allowed.  The other dogs, in turn, are then responsible for figuring out what IS allowed.  It is this process of deductive reasoning in response to these boundaries that engages a dog’s brain and produces well-disciplined and thoughtful behaviors.  When you use Sit to bring your dog under control, you are cheating him out of an important opportunity to learn responsibility.  You are missing the chance to act like the Leader that he will understand – the one that tells him what NOT to do, and encourages him come up with responsible alternative behaviors.

MY TRAINING CHALLENGE:  For an entire week, do NOT tell your dog to Sit. Instead, correct and stop those behaviors that you do not want (bad leash manners, inappropriate jumping, etc.) When your dog tries an alternative behavior, either praise it or correct it and let him try something else.  You will be amazed at the responsible companion waiting to be developed inside your whirling dervish.

-Diva

Some dogs housetrain themselves; others need our help in being convinced that it is more pleasant to do their business outside than on our Persian carpet.

For a dog, pooping and peeing is just another behavior, like begging at the table or hanging around my horses.  Like with any behavior, they will repeat it if it ends in a good result and avoid it ONLY if it ends in a less than good result.  If you feed your dog table scraps when he begs at the table, he will continue to beg.  If one of the horses on the farm kicks out, he will avoid that horse in the future.

Some puppies are born with a fastidious nature.  These are the puppies that naturally find pooping and peeing in the house distasteful – because they don’t like the smelly result.  Voila!  You have puppy that asks to go outside when he needs to relieve himself, and can be trusted to hold it all day until you return to let him out!  These puppies practically housetrain themselves, though you take all the credit.

Other puppies aren’t so prissy.  They find the immediate relief from using your floor as a toilet to be gratifying, comfortable, and worth repeating.  They find more pleasure in relief than they find displeasure in the stink.  So how do you housetrain a puppy that doesn’t care?  You help him to care.  Housetraining means a dog will actively work to avoid messing in the house, whether or not you are there to let him out.  Taking him outside every hour does not housetrain him!

Like with any other behavior that you want your dog to avoid, you will need to make messing in the house less pleasant for the puppy.  Only when a dog finds a behavior unpleasant from his perspective will he stop or avoid it.  Just because you consider piles of stinky dog poop on your floor offensive doesn’t mean your puppy feels the same.  If he did, he’d be asking to go outside.  From that dog’s perspective, putting it there felt good! We need to change that.

1.      First, crate train your puppy.  You can use either a solid-style crate, or a more open, wire style.   Both will teach your dog to accept being confined to his own space and help prevent accidents when you are not paying attention.  Because dogs are naturally “den” animals, puppies take readily to being crated and soon even seek out their crates for resting and quiet time.  Crate training will be an important element in your housetraining program now, and in managing your dog in other ways later on.  Never use the crate as punishment.  Think of it as a playpen in which you can put your puppy when you cannot supervise him.  A crate trained dog is a dog that’s easy to live with.

2.      While he is crated, your puppy cannot mess on your floors, so you can take a shower, work or go to the store without worrying about what you’ll find later.

3.      When your puppy is out of his crate, he should have a leash dragging from his flat collar and you need to watch his every move.  Never take your eyes off of him.  If you need to focus on something else, put your puppy back in his crate. When he attempts to piddle or poop indoors, lob a penny can to land where he is doing his business*.  He will think the trolls under the carpet barked at him!  You have just made the result of pooping or peeing inside the house “unpleasant”.  You’re halfway there!

4.      You quickly “rescue” your little one by taking his leash and walking him outside to an acceptable potty area.  Praise him softly if he finishes his business.  You have made it more pleasant to be outside when Nature calls.

5.      Crate your puppy for up to four hours at a time, as well as overnight.  You can have a life, your puppy will develop the ability to “hold it”, and if you can catch and correct him “in the act”, you’ll be on your way to a well-housetrained dog!

6.      You’ll know that you have successfully housetrained your dog when he begins to whine or stand by the door when he needs to “go”.  You can then try leaving him alone in the house for increasing periods of time, from just 30 minutes to several hours.  The naturally fastidious dog will be able to handle that time alone responsibly.  You can eventually be gone up to eight hours or more with that kind of dog.  The dogs that don’t care, however….probably best to crate them or let them hang out in a dog run if you have to leave for any considerable length of time.  If you are not there to open the door, they tend to exercise Option B – going on the carpet.

And that’s “the scoop” on successful housetraining,  …You’re welcome!

-Diva

* You can make your own penny can (or training can) by putting 15 pennies in an empty soda can and covering the hole with duct tape.  If you want something more attractive and sturdier, I sell professional training can kits – with instructions – through my business.  Call to order:  (707)762-6111.

Does your dog fly out the door when it is opened?  Run into the street from the front lawn?  Leave the room you are in to maraud around the house on his own?  Your dog could use some boundary training!

To teach your dog safe and practical boundaries, you need just three things:

1. a dog
2. a long line
3. a regular or training collar

With a long line attached to your dog via his collar, you can teach your dog to respect virtually any boundary – whether it is the edge of the lawn, the threshold of your front door, or the doorway of the room that you are in.  Here’s how:

1. Choose the boundary you want to teach.
2. Put a collar on your dog (either a flat collar, or a training collar like a slip chain, a martingale or pokey style).
3. Attach a long line of 15-30 feet to the collar and hold the other end.
4. When you dog reaches the boundary you want to teach, POP the long line to give a quick, sharp “that’s far enough” message through the collar.  If your dog tries again to cross the boundary, POP the line again.  The long line and collar are, in essence, acting like an invisible fence, which the dog encounters each time he tries to cross the boundary.

Repeat this several times.  Enlist the help of a friend or family member as an assistant, and have them cross the boundary, as you reinforce the do-not-pass rule for your dog.  Very soon, you will have a dog that will NOT bolt through the door, run across the street or leave the room that you are in, because he will believe and respect the boundaries that you have defined for him.

Try it!  This is especially effective for young puppies, but can work with any age dog.  Here’s to a safer life ahead through better boundaries for our dogs!

-Diva

When dealing with dogs, we must THINK like a dog.  It’s not what we do that matters, but how the dog PERCEIVES what we do.  When we give our dog too much freedom – the freedom to patrol the entire yard or property while we are gone, the freedom to hike off leash without voice control, the freedom to roam about the house and explore with no restrictions, the freedom to sniff, pull and investigate at will on our walks…we are sending a potentially dangerous  message!

In a dog’s world, freedom is relative, and associated with power.  What you are allowed or not allowed to do is directly related to your position in the pack hierarchy.  The dog at the bottom of the social hierarchy has relatively little freedom.  He cannot possess anything, as all resources are controlled by the Top Dog. He cannot eat when he feels like it, as the more dominant dogs eat their fill first, leaving him the crumbs, if any.  He can’t even take a mate, as breeding rights are the exclusive property of the Top Dog.  But he follows direction, is obedient to others and happily accepts his place in the group.

The Top Dog, on the other hand, has unlimited freedom.  When you are at the top, there is no one above you to say, “I don’t allow that”.  If no one is controlling his behavior then he is, by definition, the One in Charge.  His freedom is evidence of his rank. As Top Dog, everything belongs to him and nothing is denied him.  He is free to go where he wants, do what he wants and have what he wants.  Does your dog go where he wants, do what he wants and have what he wants?  Think about it.  We assume we’re expressing love by allowing such unrestricted freedoms, but we may be instead, creating a monster.

When we give our dog unrestricted freedom, from his perspective, we are telling him that he is in charge and that he need not listen to anyone. Since he makes the rules – he need not follow them.  When we ask that dog to do something for us, or stop doing something else, we will be ignored or worse – perhaps disciplined with a bite.   Have you ever been ignored by your dog?  Has your dog ever growled at you?   Now you know why.

Control your dog.  Limit his freedoms.  Even if there is no practical reason to do so, do it anyway – because you can.  For a happy, safe relationship with a dog, YOU must be perceived as his superior and the one that makes the rules.  It doesn’t require yelling; it simply requires control and limiting of freedom.

1. Instead of turning your dog out on the entire property or yard when you leave, build a nice dog run, and use it.
2. When you walk your dog, do not let him roam ahead, sniff at will and own the sidewalk.  Limit his acceptable space to that beside or behind you.  If you need help with pulling, consult with a good trainer.  (I know one!)
3. At home with your dog, do not allow him to leave the room you are in. (He can’t chew up your daughter’s sheepskin boots if he can’t sneak off to her closet).  Something as simple as this sends a powerful message to the dog about who is really in charge in the household.

Limit your dog’s freedom and maximize your own control, and it will fundamentally change your relationship with your dog. Love him, but control him.

Wouldn’t having a dog that listens and obeys be a great way to start the New Year?  You can do it!

Diva

In my preceding post, I explained how to stop your dog from jumping on you.  Now, I’ll give you my favorite tip for solving another jumping problem:  Jumping on guests.

To prevent this embarrassing situation, my favorite “cure” is teaching the dog to go to a special bed or mat whenever the doorbell rings, and stay there until his owner gives him permission to leave.  Think Pavlov.

1. Start by placing a nice dog bed or mat about 10 feet from your front door.  Pick a spot next to something that can serve as an “anchor” for a leash, which you will attach there as your “back-up”.

2. Elicit the help of your family or friends.  Have them ring your doorbell, and before you open the door, take your dog to his bed, give him a tasty treat, and attach the waiting leash to his collar.

3. Tell him to STAY in his bed, while you answer the door.  If he gets up, the leash will prevent him from reaching your “guest”, enabling you to quickly put him back on his bed.

4. Before you leave him a second time, SNAP his leash, and softly repeat the STAY on your bed command.  Sometimes this correction works with a flat collar, sometimes a more formal training collar is needed.  In any case, you are making it clear that your dog’s only and best option is to remain on his bed while company enters.  Do this many times and praise him softly for him compliance.

5. Require that he stay on his bed until the excitement of your guest’s arrival has calmed.  By then, the dog will be calmer, too, and far less likely to jump.  Allow him off of his bed and supervise his greetings.  Keep a leash on your dog if necessary.  Softly and calmly praise is good manners.

Soon, through these repetitions and the help of your friends, your dog will have learned a new habit (conditioned response) and a new, more acceptable way of greeting your guests when they enter your home. Then you will be ready for real guests and unexpected arrivals.  Now, you’re ready for the Holidays!

-Diva

Click Here to See Part I of “How to Cure Jumping Up”

Almost every person bringing their dog to me for a training or behavior consultation has “Jumping Up” on their list of things they want to stop. Does your dog jump up on you or your guests?  Would you like to stop this annoying (and sometimes dangerous) behavior?  This post is about stopping your dog from jumping on you.  Next post will address jumping on guests.

There are any number of techniques out there to curtail a jumping dog – from simply turning your back and ignoring the dog, to physically “kneeing” the dog in the chest as it jumps.  The former eventually works, when the dog finally gets bored with jumping and walks away, but by that time my party dress is ruined and my guests have been knocked  to the floor. I want a quicker and more reliable technique. Using a knee to the chest can work, but carries with it a certain degree of risk, both to the dog and to the person attached to that knee.  I prefer a more natural approach, and the way dogs themselves tell other dogs to keep their paws to themselves:  I “bark”.

Watch dogs at play.  The dog that does not want to be jumped on, whips around and gives a sharp, quick bark, directly in the jumper’s face.  The jumper takes the hint, and stays off.  Then, with rank and rules established, both play happily together.

A quick shake of a penny can (shown in photo) in front of a jumping dog helps me mimic a dog’s bark and establish that I will not be jumped on. It’s effective and quick! To make your own penny can, take any empty aluminum beverage can, add 10 to 15 pennies and duct tape over the hole.  When your dog jumps up, stand tall, stay very calm, and quietly say “Off”, as you give a quick, decisive shake of the can directly in front of your dog’s face.  Don’t raise your voice. Don’t lurch.  Don’t’ push your dog down.  Your goal is to make the result of jumping up less fun for your dog than it was before, simply by “barking” in response to his behavior.

The taller you stand, and the calmer you remain as you give your quick and decisive can correction, the more believable and effective you will be. Soon, you should be able to correct jumping with simply an “Off” command as you stand tall in front of your dog.  CAUTION:  Dogs react to emotion!  If you give an angry correction, you dog could get angry back – with dangerous consequences.  Stay CALM, give your correction, then PRAISE your dog for a correct response.  This is not about punishment, it’s about one result for jumping and a better result for not jumping.

If you’re into convenience, I manufacture my own penny cans and sell them in sets of 3, along with my “Dog-Training-In-A-Can” instruction booklet, which explains how to use penny cans to help stop barking, digging, housetraining accidents, stealing food, and much more!  dairydell@earthlink.net.   Good luck!

-Diva

Click Here to See Part II of “How to Cure Jumping Up”

In our human lives and roles as wives, girlfriends and mothers, many of us have come to equate accommodation with love. We clear the sofa for our husband when he needs to sit down; we change our schedule around so that we can attend our child’s recital or softball tournament.  It’s what we do.  All good people, to some degree, accommodate the people they love.  It is a good and desirable thing.

In the animal world, however, accommodation is akin to subordination.  When one dog “accommodates” another by giving up his ball, moving out of the way, or backing off when challenged, the message he is sending is,  “You win.  I defer to you “.

In my own experience, this practice of accommodation has affected even my ability to direct and manage my staff.  I’m by nature a very nice person, taught by my parents to be sensitive to the needs of others and to sometimes put their needs ahead of my own.  In most of life’s circles, that is a good rule to live by, but taken to its literal extreme, you can become a doormat. Doormats can’t manage or direct dogs, children or employees.  Doormats don’t often get all of what they want in life, either.   In my own case, I no longer accommodate; I compassionately direct.

When your dog walks faster on leash, do you speed up to keep up, instead of insisting that he walk at your pace?  When he growls and objects to being moved off the sofa, do you back off and let him remain there, on his “throne”?  When you ask him to “Stay”, but he gets up anyway, do you just shrug and let him go?  If you do any of these things, you are accommodating your dog, and cutting your personal power off at the knees, No wonder your dog doesn’t take you seriously.  Your willingness to accommodate is like saying, “Never mind”. YOU don’t take yourself seriously, so why should your dog?

Love your dog, set reasonable expectations, then follow-through quietly and fairly, without accommodation.   Avoid the other Power Sappers of fidgeting and emotional extremes, mentioned in the earlier posts, and you will be amazed at your increased effectiveness!  BTW, it works in life, too!

-Diva

FRUSTRATION & ANGER
vs. SMOTHERING LOVE

Frustration and Anger

Have you ever been so frustrated with your dog that you yell at him? It’s what most people do when they are at a loss on how to control, command or even just get their dog’s attention.  When your dog fails to respond, your anger and frustration escalate.  Finally, you give up and walk away.

The reason anger and frustration fail to control a dog is that anger and frustration signal to your dog (and to others) that you have lost control.  This type of emotional extreme destroys your power base and puts you at a vulnerable, weakened position when it comes to negotiations of any sort, whether these are negotiations with business contacts, or with your dog (!)  In dog training, you can pretty much forget about getting your dog to obey when you yell.  Animals, in particular, are acutely aware of the signals that convey relative power or weakness, because their very survival depends on their ability to recognize these signals.  Even if you don’t yell, but your voice belies an inner frustration, you telegraph that you have lost your confidence, your nerve, and your power – and your dog will most likely not obey you, because dogs follow only confident leaders.

Remember – obedience is about who has POWER, and clearly you don’t have any if you’re frustrated and let it show.

Smothering Love

At the other end of the emotional spectrum is excessive, smothering love.  This is not as common a problem for dog owners as frustration and anger, but it does bear mentioning.

Don’t get me wrong – I like hugging and kissing my dogs as much as the next person, but some dog owners take it to the extreme, smothering their dogs with excessive displays of affection, with continual holding, hugging, kissing, etc.  When normal love and affection morph into this extreme form, the dog begins to see himself as superior to his fawning owner.  Smothering love can send a message of subordination, not love. Take a lesson from the successful kindergarten teacher  -or parent for that matter.  They do not fawn over their children; they keep love and discipline in perfect balance.  Nature loves balance, and so does your dog.

Beware of these two Power-Sappers:  Anger and Smothering Love.

-Diva